1982; directed by Ridley Scott; adapted by Hampton Fancher and David Peoples; 117 mins

So, this’ll be my 7th or 8th viewing of Blade Runner and I hope I will like it this time. With Blade Runner 2049 upon us, it’s high time I gave it another go… Continue reading



2015; directed by Alejandro G. Iñárritu; adapted by Alejandro G. Iñárritu and Mark L. Smith; 156 mins

I write this actually not wanting to be the voice of dissent but as Oscars near and the actual talk about the actual movies that have been nominated ebbs and flows, The Revenant is being hailed by damn near all and sundry as the front-runner and the best film of the year. I don’t wanna be the voice of dissent because so many twats tarnish the joy of dissent with strategic, unbelievable diatribes against the Academy favourites. Fair play, for once, to the Academy because they very, very rarely pick the best film of the year but then equally as rarely do they have properly bad films in their choice of nominees. Continue reading


2012; adapted and directed by David Cronenberg; 109 mins

Watching the teaser trailer for this with the strobing visuals, riots, nudity, gunshots, a large rat attacking the limo and a barrage of stars – this looked like a fascinating, sexy, exciting new David Cronenberg movie! Turns out – it wasn’t!

This was my second attempt at this one but to be fair, the first time I watched it, I was so pissed I would’ve slept through Die Hard so this never had a chance. On second viewing, I was completely compus mentis and also aware that it had to go back to United Video, I tried again. Here we go. Continue reading


2015; directed by Sam Taylor-Johnson; adapted by Kelly Marcel; 125 mins

This is a review of mine that was first printed in The Critic.

When student Anastasia Steele improbably interviews icy billionaire Christian Grey, she finds herself as trapped as we are in a downward spiral of kinky sex and utter tediousness. Fair play to Dakota Johnson – she’s a shining beacon of light and likeability amidst this utter dross. Unfortunately, even she is hamstrung by a character so badly written, her character arc is like watching someone picking petals off of a flower, chanting “he loves me, he loves me not [ad nauseum]”. Continue reading